I have recently been reading a lot of adult novels about sprawling families. They start out small and then the characters get older and become adults and have children of their own and life gets . . . complicated. And sad. And overwhelming. And the adult kids aren’t such great friends and they don’t get along with their parents. There are regrets and mistakes and betrayals and all the things that make literary fiction a lot to take on.
As I’ve been reading these books, which are beautiful, but heavy but really beautiful, I’ve been thinking, is life joyful? Do families survive? Are parents always ruining their children? Will my children go to therapy and talk about me? is that okay? What does hope mean? How do we get through hard times? Why is connection so difficult? And so important? And sometimes, does it feel safer to isolate than to be vulnerable and real and let your heart get stomped or maybe loved but maybe stomped?
I also have been thinking about what a refuge it is to read hard things and then work through the mistakes and sadnesses on a couch in the sunshine. To feel not so alone because other fake but so real people are going through a lot of the same things I am. To see futures and try to understand what I want and don’t want. To see that healing can happen and kids are resilient and happy and true. I love kids.
I love kids.
I love that they get to feel things so deeply but also play so hard and laugh so much and get hurt all the time and scream if they get hurt. SCREAM!!!! They get to scream and yell and run around live so fully in the grass and on the tramp and in the dirt. They get to wonder at the praying mantis and touch a snake and then SCREAM!!! They get to feel love fully and truly and they get to forgive so much better than I do. They get to cling and whisper and skip and dance and I love them.
I always want them right here with me. I always want to draw with them and try to learn how to not get mad at them because they SCREAM and they eat all the peanut butter and steal the chocolate chips and put on mustaches and capes and jump from the couches and live their life and SCREAM!!!!!
I’m glad to be an adult but oh how I love the kids. Oh how I want to be like them and learn form them and be like them and SCREAM!!! whenever I want to and people still love me and hold me.
I think a fabulous party is the way to celebrate. We must know, like Carol said, how many of you were able to accomplish the hour a day. And even if you tried . . . most days . . . it still counts.
I did great in spurts and then would have an off day. I did try to make up for the times I missed by going longer on other days. Next time we do this, I’m going to keep log and MAKE SURE I do every minute.
Again, let us know if you would like to join us and we’ll decide a place!
Also, the three of us are participating in this year’s Writing for Charity conference.
There will agents and writers and more writers and food! Come hang out with us!
Friends, an article said it takes two to eight months to make a habit. What do you think? Has it started to become a habit? Also, Anne Tyler who I like very much said this:
IF I WAITED UNTIL I FELT LIKE WRITING, I’D NEVER WRITE AT ALL.
Keep going, my friends. Keep going.
is it going?
Here is a poem to think about.
My favorite stanza:
When it’s over, I want to say all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.
Maybe at the beginning of your writing time, write about this.
One hour a day. xoxo
Ladies and Gents,
I’m a big believer in being kind to yourself. Did you miss a day? Maybe even two? What??!! Three???? GASP!
We love you and you are not off the hook. Here is what you do:
Start again today.
I had a rough week with many things like ketchup and eclipses and laundry and people going in and out of school for various reasons and two littles following me around. It was not the perfect week HOWEVER, I am soldiering on. I am adding minutes to make up for days I was short and I am eating lots of cherry tomatoes.
So, start today.
Don’t worry about yesterday (unless you burned your eyes–if that’s the case, go see a doctor) and let’s keep going!
Are you ready?
Have you set aside time?
Are you prepared to battle the urge to look at social media or get some food or straighten up the office (the only time I feel like cleaning is when it’s time to write)?
Remember, it’s one hour, every day, for the next month. One hour. If you have to do it in 15 minute increments, IT STILL COUNTS!
Here’s my tip for today: Push through. If you get stuck, keep going. Or write something else. But keep writing. Don’t stop.
Here is one more tip but it’s not really a tip because I don’t know how to use it yet: I recently was told about todoist. This is a website/app that lets you organize your checklists and things you need to get done. It can be daily tasks, weekly tasks and monthly/yearly tasks. I can see this as a great asset for getting writing in daily. Also for planning what you want to write when. You could add in reading assignments, craft things you want to study, goals you want to make, etc. I’m going to try it and see if it helps me. If you end up using it and liking it, let us know.
So, when are you going to write each day? Commit! For me it’s going to be different every day because of my life but I’m going to make it happen. Today it’s 10:30-11:30. xoxox