Category Archives: Depression

Catch Up–Freaky Friday

Pretend Monday:

I’ve been missing Rick a lot lately.

Telling everyone I’m missing him.

Wondering why all that crap had to happen.

Wishing so much things could have been different.

I think, at the end, he was in lots of pain. But he couldn’t speak anymore, or even squeeze our hands.

Grief can inspire us to write. Or can immobilize us. I think the latter has happened to me.



Pretend Wednesday

Kyra Leigh, Queen Bee:

This year Kyra will have lots of interviews with upcoming and established authors.


Pretend Three Thing Thursday:

1.Come to the party we’re having this month at the Provo library!


January 20, potluck, lots of prizes to win!

Go here to learn more and register:

2. February ERIN HARRIS from FOLIO!!! YAHOOOOO!!!!

Go here (again) to learn more:

3. Writing Question:

What is the worst thing you could do as a writer? Take some time to contemplate this question. If you’d like, share.


Freaky Friday:

Writing Quotes


So far I have completed almost two of my three goals I made with you all.

One and one third to go!






Filed under CLW, Depression, Exercises, three thing thursday, writing process

15-Minute Monday

Yesterday my daughters tried to  poison me.

I refused to have a Mother’s Day. But Elise and Carolina made dinner.  I was up all night.

I’m in this weird place.

I don’t like it.

Here’s what I know about depression.

My reminder.

A refresher course.

Depression doesn’t care if you make goals.

It doesn’t care  if you are behind and are struggling to catch up.

It doesn’t care  who you  hurt or how you hurt.

Depression doesn’t give a damn about the people in your life or in your heart or in your head.

You feel sorry because you got the stupid phone and don’t want to use it.

You feel sorry for everything that’s going on that you don’t know how to fix.

You feel sorry about the choices other people are making. Or that your baby is growing up. Or that all the work you do seems to go unnoticed.

It’s an ugly pity party but you can’t help it.

You know you sound like a whiny bird but you don’t care and when you try to feel anything other than no hope, there’s just a big empty place where your heart should be.

I think one of the worst parts of when I feel like this, is that it feels like even God does not care.

Don’t worry.  I sound dramatic.

I’ll be fine.  Certainly I’ve been here before.

It’s not pleasant.  But don’t writers live in this awful hole?

Getting out is just taking a lot longer than it feels like it usually does.

Maybe my girls were just trying to put me out of my misery.



Filed under CLW, Depression, Life

Three Things Thursday


How’s the writing?

Are you doing it?


Not me so far. BUT TODAY I WILL!

Last night I came home from dinner with three of my girls and realized I was 30 minutes late to a book group I was supposed to attend. I’d already cried off my mascara, but I made it there before everyone left.

Today I am going to write several hours.

And that’s great for right now.

Here’s are my TTT cohorts!



There are writers I admire for their works. There are writers I admire for their intellect. There are writers I admire for their work ethic. There are writers I admire for their sly humor. Put all these together, and call him Isaac Asimov!
Asimov, in his own words:
The one absolute requirement for me to write . . . is to be awake.
I don’t know any but the simplest rules of English grammar, and I seldom consciously apply them.  Nevertheless, I instinctively write correctly and, I like to think, in an interesting fashion. I know when something sounds right and when it doesn’t, and I can tell the difference without hesitation, even when writing at breakneck speed. How do I do this? I haven’t the faintest idea.
When I feel difficulty coming on, I switch to another book I’m writing. When I get back to the problem, my unconscious has solved it.
Thinking is the activity I love best, and writing to me is simply thinking through my fingers. I can write up to 18 hours a day.  Typing 90 words a minute, I’ve done better than 50 pages a day. Nothing interferes
with my concentration. You could put on an orgy in my office and I wouldn’t look up — well, maybe once.
If my doctor told me I had only six months to live, I wouldn’t brood.  I’d type a little faster.
Some of the best stories I’ve read have been ruined by weak climaxes. One of the main reasons for this is a weak antagonist. If your villain is a genius mastermind, it doesn’t make sense for them to suddenly make a moronic mistake. 

Rewrite your climax from the point of view of your antagonist. Start at the beginning point, but then stop looking at your original manuscript. Let the climax grow organically from the antagonist’s perspective. Does it follow the same path? Does he say and do the same things?
If the two versions don’t match, try to find a middle ground. Both characters need to stay true to themselves, and the best story will allow them both to breathe.

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Filed under CLW, Depression, Life, three thing thursday, Writing Marathon


Summer sort of begins for me a few days after ALA. The older I get, the harder it is to recuperate from WIFYR. And if I’ve made the trip to ALA, well there you go. (I love going to ALA, BTW.)

But then I have July and August (school starts the last day of August this year) sort of to myself. I mean, I can write and rewrite. And paint this new home we’re in and maybe even make my bed if I want to.

There are clothes to organize, weeds to pull, food storage to think about and do something with, boxes to unpack, closets to clean out, Mom to care for, and of course, every days has to have some kid time in it. I do have these beautiful daughters.

Constantly, though, there are the story ideas.

No matter how hard life is (and it’s been a beast for several months now), there are places to escape to, words to worry over, plots to play with.

The stories are always in my head.


So here are questions for a writer to think on:

How do you keep track of your stories? Especially if you have lots of crazy ideas spinning around.

How do you decide which is the best idea to spend time on?

How long to you work on a book before you’re done?

Is it bad to write lots of words as fast as you can, even if they are crummy words?

During rewrite, what do you do with discarded words?

How much time do you give yourself for your writing?

How much time do you really write–how much do you check your social sites?

How do you know, before you do it, if it’s going to be worth the time to follow a character for 60,000 words?

Why do you keep going?


That’s the biggest question of all. This is a hard, many times, unrewarding venture. We’re lonely, underpaid (if paid at all), and many times our delicious books don’t get into the right editor’s hands, or readers’ hands. When  books are published, most don’t get the awards they deserve, and certainly many don’t sell as well as other novels that seem poorly written. It’s frustrating, sometimes hard to watch, and so very personal.


If I didn’t publish, would I still keep doing this?

Truthfully, probably not as hard as I do now. But I would spend time each day working on a novel. And when I had cleaned that book up the best I could, I’d start another. I’d write another and another and another. Why?

Because I’m a writer.

That’s who I am.

All the way down to the bone.



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Filed under CLW, Depression, Exercises, writing process